Breaking-up’s hardest chapter is living on the dream that someday he would come back, that somehow he would call to say he changed his mind and that he would appear in the streets one fine day to hug you tight and ask to start all over again.
Girl, snap out of it! As long as you have hope, recovery is impossible. The world around you is changing in the sense that some people in your life and your other routines no longer fit in your current situation. There is no other way but to let go and adapt the new direction that life is leading you.
The list below is not the classic, regular and traditional approach to break up. You will not be advised to get lost, escape and fool yourself. You will not be asked to burn pictures and eat chocolates because you’re not a teenager anymore. You are a strong independent woman, who made a decision to get in that relationship. Now, you have to try to deal with it alone. You will try not to bother your friends with your drama. This time, you’ll try to be responsible for you own actions for a change. Here are 6 sadomasochistic, self-help rituals to help you face the problem head on.
#1) Never Contact the Dead
Crazy and creepy things happen when you try to get in touch with the deceased. It may sound harsh but this a way to stop thinking about the possibility of reconciliation. Issue yourself a restraining order if need be. You have to do something better than talk about your ex as if he’s the most person in the world. Stop stalking his fb and his other social media accounts.
#2) Write it Down
Putting all your honest thoughts into writing can be very therapeutic. Pour all the things that bother you, everything from his imperfections to things that make you an amazing person onto that sheet of paper. Write a letter and get it all out until your hands get tired. Don’t be afraid to pour all your heart’s content. It doesn’t matter if it’s pathetic because no one else has to know. You can say everything that you would like to say without holding back because you will not send it anyway. Toss it to the trash bin or keep it as a souvenir.
#3) Sweet Torture
Redirecting the pain doesn’t work for everyone. When you’re having a headache, you don’t ask someone to slap you hard in the face so that you can transfer the pain. That’s stupid. What you need to do is rub the break-up in your face by singing or listening to love songs and watching romantic movies all by yourself. Whatever situation you have, for sure there’s a love story or a song written about it. Feel the pain because it will make you feel alive. It’s a constant reminder of what he has done to you and it will make you survive.
Suppressed emotions are dangerous. It can lead to depression, bad mood and an ugly face. You have to cry but you will have to cry with style. In this activity, you would have to face the mirror, internalize and film yourself. Imagine that your room is your stage. As the main and only actress in this story, you don’t have any shoulders to cry on. Since you’re also the director, you have to be creative in shooting the scene. Try standing against the wall and then slowly sit on the floor while crying or you can use some props. Grab a floor brush or a rug, get on your knees and scrub the floor until it sparkles, all while crying. At least, you get to turn your emotion into something useful. Then, watch your video to see how you did.
After adjusting to his cheap lifestyle, he still managed to cheat on you and break your trust. By now, you should already know that you can never turn a cockroach into a butterfly or a dirty pig into a charming puppy. You have to make him pay by creating your own special target shooting range. Get a cardboard and draw grids similar to a bulls-eye target. Place his picture right in the center and stick it to your wall. Go to the other end of your room and start shooting using a toy gun. He didn’t show you no mercy so you will have to show his none. You can also try bowling by sticking his pictures on the pins or you can also cut his photo into very small pieces and make a puzzle out of it.
The break-up probably made you feel that everything about you is wrong and that you’re not good enough. You might feel more insecure and more bitter than bitter melon. Keep your focus. Remind yourself that you’re a strong woman, who has so much to offer. Start fresh by listening to the needs of your earthly body. Reorganize your room and change the sheets and curtains. Get yourself some new trendy clothes, tone and pamper that body and style your hair. Re-evaluate your life and get a spiritual make-over as well. Know what you want, do some volunteer work for the community and carry the ethos of beauty with a purpose. These things will make you a healthier and a happier woman inside out.
Don’t get lost in the middle of the process. Remember that your mission is not to make him regret leaving you. This is about you trying to move on. Let karma take care of him. Don’t even wish him bad. Instead, wish for him to be happy and you, happier. Have a graceful exit with your head up high.
Is there something else that you would like to add on the list? Feel free to leave your comments below.